Yup, I coach and train middle and high school teachers in restorative practices implementation for improved teacher-to-student and student-to-student relationships, which promote healthier classroom communities. Healthier classroom communities equate to more effective teaching and more equitable and engaged learning. Restorative practices, in general, can be a powerful methodology for growing healthy classroom communities, when done with fidelity.
In addition to– being a restorative educator, coach and trainer, I am a clumsy relater. This flaw in my otherwise perfect personality (Please stop laughing!) also contributed to making me a pretty effective classroom teacher. While I wasn’t necessarily a verbal ogre, my communication with students was less than restorative. The clumsy relater in me had initially shown up in the classroom as sarcastic, abrupt, and a bit of a hard-butt when it came to student work ethic.
Fortunately, however, I was also mushy on the inside, so the first time a student brought her hurt feelings to my attention, my own heart caught a deep pang of empathy. That was the moment when I realized that I wanted and needed to be in relationship with my students. My effectiveness and teacher lifespan depended on it. As a classroom teacher, I was, of course, perpetually in relationship with students.
But the question became, What kind of relationship did I want to be in with them?
I was a classroom educator for nearly 15 years and like all teachers, I was faced with the daunting task of managing new attitudes, emotions, moods and behaviors every school year.
There was so much need, and too little instructional time to harness, three 90-minute periods a day, five days a week.
Although my teaching style was definitely authoritative, everything that I’d learned about classroom management in teacher school and from books seemed so transactional and punitive.
I had a vision for teaching and student learning but with so many classroom management tips, tools and strategies floating around inside my brain, I had no structure for that vision. Not until I was introduced to Restorative Practices.
I’d been given this little green book entitled Restorative Circles in Schools: Building Community and Enhancing Learning; a practical guide for educators (International Institute for Restorative Practices) and I was hooked. Classroom relationship-building defined by “mutual trust, respect, dignity” and with a side of accountability?
I was like, Let’s gooooo!
After attending some restorative circle workshops and participating in some community circles, I showed up to period 1, 3 and 5 with some check-in questions, a rain stick (talking piece), a few circle agreements and a structured vision for an improved classroom community. The clumsiness continued.
My students, many of whom were uncomfortable or just resistant, slogged through the process with me and eventually, weekly and quarterly circle facilitation became my classroom relationship staple.
Becoming a restorative educator wasn’t easy or always convenient and it certainly didn’t mean that I wasn’t still a clumsy relater. I just became less clumsy and more self-compassionate.
It also wasn’t “happily ever-after” for my students’ attitudes, emotions, moods and behaviors. But each year, I observed their growth academically, personally and socially. This was largely because I’d committed us to tending to our classroom relationships regularly, one bumbling and compassionate restorative circle at a time.
Long before I left the classroom, I knew that I wanted to support other teachers whose visions had been obscured by managing attitudes, emotions, moods and behaviors almost all day, everyday. I wanted to help secondary educators restore CALM (my framework for effective teaching and equitable and engaged learning.) by getting out of the classroom management game and creating opportunities for students to practice managing themselves.
Ready to step out of the manager role and into your teacher vision?